A long Tale( adult humor)

Updated: Aug 17

By wendiann alfieri

DISCLAIMER ADULT HUMOR 18+. If you do NOT feel comfortable with semi-dirty humor, this is a advanced warning

There was a time

a tale too long

to explain

in this song

valiantly, I will try

its message is about a ("myth")conception

Just sit right back

listen to this

all Dicks come

with false promises

longer or short

fat or slim

his penis is always part of him

we women dread:

his brain is just in the head

this is the story of a man

called Quip.

he was always lonely, empty before a start

the problem was cause he couldn't go to bed,never being able to go back from where he comes

He had just broken up with his girl of months ten

She dumped him, he was distraught

thinking what did I do wrong?

He got to the conclusion

she wanted more than he could give

in terms of his package.

he didn't have much to begin with

Then the tv blares, and what does he see?

A commercial, one just he needs

he's watching and drinking in the advertisements gleam

"The Magic Boner, just take one pill, it'll make you point in the right direction, when you find the perfect match to love you and your erections. when it's your time to fill up your tank

and go through as equals, one who can drive, don't be scared you don't have to hide, when the miracle happens once your inside"

He calls the number, orders the pills

in the evening next, he goes to

the bar

instantly, he feels a connection

over yonder working as in the bartenders section

He's walking towards to her

says hi, all shy, and says he needs a drink

after talking they both felt privy

to after closing, getting frisky

soon it was right as it seemed

she leans in and kisses him on the cheek

just taking in this new beauty

not to his surprise,

she wants to be satisfied, this is the time

for him to really rise and shine

they go to his place

he feels confident, goes back and takes a pill, maybe this time it'll help

they are lying in bed kissing and touches

and finally

he goes to use it

it was just reaching completion

when it stopped half-way

leaving both confused

he excuses himself from the room he takes

another pill

its just

she had other things in her life to do

out the door she walked, mind you

he returns, she's no longer around

for most men,

when it stands up

it's time for a fuck

He texted his ex, maybe she never really minded

that in terms of his dick,

he was short-sighted

he texted her, still a little drunk

"why won't you go out with me?"

she replied:

"Dude, you stole my fucking car and crashed it"

Oh yeah, he forgot bout that tiny facet.





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